Part 2 in the 3-part series to Stop the Chaos

Have you completed your Top 5 Priorities for Life? Heavy stuff, right? Good! It should be! Now, armed with our Top 5 Priorities list, let’s set some measurable, realistic goals that will help us achieve that dream lifestyle. Remember, these goals must align with our Priorities, otherwise we may end up with 10 ways to make more money, but forget that we also wanted to build intimacy in our relationships or learn to laugh at ourselves.

State your Priority

Let’s take an easy one from my list yesterday, which happens to be my #1 priority:

Reach and maintain a healthy size 4, while toning and defining all-over.

Find Your “Why”

Why is this priority important to me? Because losing weight, toning up and gaining energy will help me achieve the long-term goals I have and give me the added confidence I need to make some big life changes.

Your WHY is very important – it would benefit you to Write. This. Down. And refer to it often.

Make it Measurable

Well, it’s nice to have a goal weight – but I need to give it a deadline. A reasonable weight loss is about 2lbs per week. So, let’s say I want to lose 10 lbs by Aug 7 and fit a size 6. That would be my goal, it states the “what”  and the “by when.”

Now I need 9 more that align with my *Priorities.

Drop and give me 10!

Currently, these are my Top 10 Goals (NOTE: These will be reviewed and renewed every 4 weeks, so don’t stress about what to include on your list):

1. By August 7, I want to have lost 10 lbs and be a size 6. {Life Priority #1}
2. Earn $______ by Feb 28, 2012 through teaching writing workshops. {Life Priority #3}
3. Earn $_______by April 1, 2012 through teacher workshops and speaking engagements. {Life Priority #3}
4. Have Half Moon Bay Resort novel ready to query to agents by January 1, 2012. {Life Priority #3}
5. By November 1, have our bedroom de-cluttered, repainted and my office area streamlined to promote focus and creativity. {Life Priority #2}
6. Save $____ per month, so we can take a family beach vacation in December. {Life Priority #5}
7. Stay true to my weekly planning and prepping nutrition. {Life Priority #1}
8. Train to walk in the JDRF 5k on Oct 2, 2011. {Life Priority #4}
9. By July 15, have hall and front closets cleaned out and repurposed. {Life Priority #2}
10. By August 1, have the boys’ bedroom de-cluttered and organized into “zones” they can maintain to simplify their space and promote creativity and peace. {Life Priority #2}

I’m curious to see what you guys have on your Top 10 List of Goals – and your Top 5 Priorities. Please share with us!

*What happens when something on your Priority list is so far-off, you don’t know where to begin to reach it? Come back tomorrow when we’ll  talk about all the baby steps that lead up to the Big Goals. It’s the Motherlode List…

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Commit to 3

I started this weekly series a few months back, with the intention of motivating myself and others. The purpose was to have that One Big Goal in mind and chip away at all the necessary steps in reaching that Goal, while maintaining the other “necessities of life.”  Commit to 3, i.e. baby steps.

Well, I’ve been slacking in the commitment department, at least in the posting and focusing of those commitments.  I apologize if I let my readers down.  Going forward, my promise to you (and myself) is to post my Top 3 Commitments each Monday. You can help me, by posting your goals, too. And if you don’t see the “Commit to 3”  post every Monday(by dinner time), I give you permission to email me and ask “What’s up, Mary Jo? What are you committing to this week?!” mjcwriter”at”comcast”dot”com

So, from my list, I’m going to choose only 3 items that MUST be completed this week. I challenge you to do the same! Oh, and don’t forget your “Salary.”  

*BONUS CHALLENGE: Make 2 of the 3  goals for YOU only(not your kids, spouse, friends, etc.)

This week I commit to 3:

1. Bake cookies for teachers of KidsClub (deliver Wednesday)
2. Complete Exercises from Ch 1 of Beginnings, Middles & Ends by Nancy Kress (use as Reader Wednesdays post in the future.)
3. Phone call with (possible) new personal trainer – learn about her plan and rates – make decision (excited, scared!)

Salary:  2 hrs of uninterrupted reading time on Sunday (to catch up on FREE ebooks & workbooks  by Jonathon Mead)

As you’re creating your Commit to 3 list, keep this in mind:

“One hour per day of study will put you at the top of your field within three years. Within five years you’ll be a national authority. In seven years, you can be one of the best people in the world at what you do.”

Earl Nightingale
1921-1989, Author and Speaker

So, how are you pushing yourself towards your goals? Make your list, commit to it, post it in the comments so we can keep each other accountable! Go!

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Thankful Thursday

“It isn’t what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about.”
Dale Carnegie
1888-1955, Author of How to Win Friends and Influence People

What are you thinking about today? I’m still struggling with an overall negative attitude – not sure why-that I can’t shake. So, today, I’m thankful that I have the choice to change my mindset. Starting Now.

I’m thankful…

for warm weather

for sun after weeks of rain

for a much-needed getaway with my husband (trip coming up soon!)

first sip of coffee in the morning

learning the books and CD’s I requested arrived at my library!

story ideas bubbling under the surface

Let us bask in your gratitudes – share them here!

Commit to 3: Do-Over!

Setting Goals is step one. Completing those goals is step two. But what happens if you never make it to step two? Chuck your plans out the window? Weep into a bowl of cookie dough ice cream? Pull your blinds down, unplug your phone/internet and become a mole?

No, you get back up, set new goals or trace back your steps –  how did you veer off course? Was it someone or some event that sideswiped your plans? Perhaps that someone was you.

Well, last week, that someone was me. I had a crazy-busy week of overtime at the office, shopping, cooking, blogging, emailing and yes, Tweeting on Twitter. But I’m not going postal and I’m not burying myself in a bowl of ice cream or darkness. I know I was in a sour mood most of last week, too overwhelmed and distracted, then full of excuses on why I couldn’t or didn’t get any of my 3 goals completed.

It’s OK. The world didn’t spin off its orbit (surprisingly!) and no kids or animals were hurt in the wake of my foul attitude.

I declare a Do-Over!

This week:

1. Follow up on guest blog opportunity for my local news paper : )
2. Email my students asking for fiction/poetry/essay submissions
3. Revise Ch 1 and send to my crit partners
4. Get up and do Ripped in 30 DVD every morning: Mon-Fri

Salary:  buy a pretty hanging plant for my patio

Got goals? Share them with us. If you write them down, you’re that much closer to accompishing them!

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I LOVE when I see that new peeps have subscribed! There may be a random drawing of my subscribers to receive a prize  in the future…hint – hint

5 Prompt Friday

First, I must ask for a moment of silence to honor our fallen American Idol comrade, Casey Abrams. I believe Casey possesses the whole package: an understanding of music: both history and theory; the IT factor to experiment and challenge himself and of course, the confidence that makes this red-headed, bearded guy “sexy” and charismatic. I’m not worried about Casey’s future – I’m sure we’ll hear and see from him again outside the American Idol realm. But, remember, as you write – Experiment and Challenge yourself; you don’t need to impress the masses, just your own circle of fans. Find them, be true to what they expect and love from you and you’ll have a following of loyal readers.

And now…

Prompts to motivate that pen!

1. At the tone the time will be….
2. “Squeeze my hand if you understand.”
3. Inside the locket was a picture of…
4. A sobbing child with smeared chocolate on his cheek.
5. Beer here! Get your ice-cold Beer here!

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What I learned this week

…in writing, marketing, teaching, and life!

Writing

• Need help with a 1-minute pitch for your book? I found this link, which is a free pitch generator
• This week on writelikeCRAZY (Where young writers gather) I’ve been talking about creating characters.  Found this interesting software for more tips! Character Writer 3.0

Marketing

• Found on Twitter (I signed up for TweetBeep: alerts when someone mentions you, your handle, your links, etc. also tracks ReTweet’s)
  http://www.meryl.net/2009/01/50-writer-uses-for-twitter/  This is all a part of the social networking etiquette. If someone mentions me, I will know and can reciprocate (or at least tweet a “thanks!”)
• Used Mr Tweet to find relevant suggestions /recc’s for those to follow on Twitter (provides lists who follows them, who has RT’d or mentioned them in tweets.) This is helpful, because I will see tweets that relate to my industry, learn about news,contest, etc; find links and possibly buddies!
• Linked to a great site for Public Relations help. Tips on writing and tweaking your own Press Releases and there is even a Press Release formatting guideline

Teaching

• I’ve been reading Writing Magic, Creating Stories That Fly, by Gail Carson Levine  which offers young writers a wealth of tips on fiction writing, including prompts.

Life

• Ha! Always learning in this category. I’m a control freak. Yes, I’ve said it before and it bears repeating. Control freaks have a phobia about asking for help, but I’m slowly overcoming that fear. This week, I needed to reach out for help on things beyond my experience. Car problems, babysitting schedules and in the writing realm: I am asking parents and students of mine for their testimonials and help in publicizing my Young Writers Summer Studio. I also requested and received help from one of my mentors, Christina Katz, with my local platform development.
• I also learned to slow down, a little. Baby steps, ya know? I scaled back on my responsibilities with Capitol City Young Writers, the nonprofit organization I volunteer with.  I will be phasing out the job of creating, editing and sending the quarterly newsletter and picking up the task of managing their new young writers blog.
• Hugs! You can never give or receive too many…

What have you learned this week?

Go ahead and Jump!

“To do anything truly worth doing, I must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in with gusto and scramble through as well as I can.”

Og Mandino, 1923-1996, Author and Speaker

 

{photo coutesy of SparrowsFlame}

We all face fear, especially as artists. There is the doubt whether we are really “that good.” There is the evil little whisper of our inner critic that makes us pause long enough to forgo a unique idea. Or that good ‘ol “common sense” who has a list of excuses at the ready.

Today, my goal of moving out of the cubicle world and into a world of full time writing and teaching young writers is being stumped. How can I commit to teaching an on-going after-school young writers’ workshop in my community if I realistically don’t get home from work until almost dinner time? Are parents and students going to want to come back to school in the evening for this program, rather than a short walk to another class when the last bell rings at 3pm? Can I adjust my day job hours, again? Is that completely irrational, given today’s job market, to possibly jeopardize my steady income?

When faced with the unknown, we paralyze ourselves.  I know I do. I over think, over analyze. Then, you know what happens? Somebody else who has the same idea takes that jump – and makes it.  And I can kick myself.

So, I will muster up the courage and take the next step. Maybe not a full “leaping in with both feet,” but I will make the call, set the appointment and map out my plan with the school. Who knows? It may all work out.

What is stopping you from taking the jump?

Summer lovin’

Happy Summer!

Coppertone - 1953 ad

OK, Summer doesn’t “officially” begin until June 21, which is also Father’s Day this year (and my mother-in-law’s birthday – Love ya, Rose!) But flipping the calendar page to June just sets my warm-weather clock a-tickin’.

School will be out, my work hours will shorten and hopefully the “lazy days” will be relaxing but productive for my writing.  A plan of action needs to be in place, not just for the next few months, but leading into fall and the new school year, as well.  Geez, Mary Jo, you’re saying, isn’t it bad enough that school supplies will be on sale soon? Can’t we just relax and enjoy this slower paced time of year?  

Sure, if you want to starve. Maybe not starve, but you will fall behind while other freelance writers are working their way up the ranks.  Businesses don’t close down for the summer and neither should you. If you’re taking your writing seriously, as a business, that is.  I’ve already emailed the principal of my son’s middle grade school to discuss the possibility of starting an after school writing club. And began plans for National Novel Writing Month, which isn’t until NOVEMBER!

Adjustments to your regular writing routine may be needed and beneficial to you and your family – but don’t STOP writing!

So, what are your writing plans for the summer?

Good News x 2

In reading Christina Katz‘s second great writing resource, Get Known Before the Book Deal, I learned that writers should toot their own horn when they achieve little successes. How else would our readers/followers know what we’re up to?

So, taking Ms. Katz’s advice, I’d like to “toot” about my recent successes in publication and contest entries!

Underwired, a KY based women’s print magazine, just accepted my essay “Cravings” for publication in their upcoming June ’09 issue.  I wrote “Cravings” last September, with a different market in mind. I wrote the essay from my perspective on motherhood and our needs to give in to guilty little pleasures. I wrote, rewrote, sent to my writing buddies for critiques, rewrote again and finally submitted to skirt! magazine, who politely and promptly rejected my essay due to “no space.”

Of course it was a minor blow, equivalent to a small crescent shaped shiner under my right eye, but I went down my list of markets and sent the essay out again, this time to Imperfect Parent.  My essay seemed to fit their tongue-in-cheek humor and bold observations on being a parent without losing your identity. Weeks, then months went by with no reply and an updated message on their website stated they were “backlogged” and no longer accepting submissions.  So, I emailed the editor, again, and professionally stated I’d be pulling my essay from their consideration if I hadn’t heard back by a specific date. No reply and off to the market guidelines I returned.

So, you can imagine my elation when the editor of Underwired replied via email with a “Congratulations! We’ll see you in print…” Not to mention the attached contract that spelled out payment and rights for my publication of “Cravings.”

The lesson in this? Keep moving forward. Don’t lose momentum, don’t lose your faith or your focus. Your essay may be personal to you, but editors have a job to do and though they may appreciate your wit or tone, it may not fit for their publication.

My second “toot” is about another exciting email I received a few days ago, in regards to my fiction entry for the 100 Words or Fewer Writing Contest.  This email said I was at the top of the mountain where the air was thin. My entry “In Father Brannigan’s Room” had made it past two levels of judging and is now in the running for 1st, 2nd or 3rd place! 100 little words, crafted so carefully, rewritten about 20 times, paragraphs cut and pasted in different order to achieve the maximum effect of “wow” in such a small space.  And I deliriously wait,  with little oxygen.

Who thought after writing for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) where every word counts and even contractions are banished to maximize  number of words, I’d be able to cut out prepositions, articles and adverbs to ruthlessly minimize word count and tell a full story with less than 100 words. An achievement in itself. I’m proud to have even accepted the challenge.

And when the winners are announced in mid-June, I’ll be back to “toot” some more (hopefully!)

Keep writing and submitting my friends! And please share your successes here and EVERYWHERE!

Rejection Reflection

“Often we allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. We lose many irreplaceable hours brooding over grievances that, in a year’s time, will be forgotten by us and by everybody. No, let us devote our life to worthwhile actions and feelings, to great thoughts, real affections and enduring undertakings.” Andre Maurois ~ 1885-1967, Writer

I found this quote in my inbox this morning, courtesy of insightoftheday.com.  It was the epitome of what I felt yesterday and still, a bit this morning.

Rejection. That sting of not winning a contest, or not getting a reply from an editor or getting a reply that says “you suck.” OK, not exactly those words, but it feels  like that is what they’re saying, right?

  

Then, yesterday, another blow to my writer’s ego. The “Silent Character Contest” judge should have emailed me to announce that I won the Grand Prize. Alas, after obsessively methodically refreshing my email, there was no winning message. There was no message from this judge at all. My heart sank when I read on their website that the Grand Prize winner was…not me. I worked on this short fiction piece for weeks, editing, rewriting, eliminating unnecessary words, letting it sit and then coming back to bleed on it again. My efforts were not completely unrecognized; my story did make it past the 2^nd round of judging.  But it was a rejection, just the same.

What did I do? You’re expecting a ballad to play here as I triumphantly declare, “As God as my witness, I will never go hungry again!” OK, enough of the Gone with the Wind melodrama. I didn’t cry, but felt like I could. I shared the news with my husband who was most sympathetic. I also posted on my writers’ group blog, my support system, the wind beneath my wings…Seriously, though, just typing how I felt, I knew these writer mamas would understand. Family and friends are wonderful, but a fellow writer truly feels your pain in rejection.

These wonderful women sent me virtual Frappachino’s, chocolate and hugs. But most effective were their words of encouragement. The “it’s OK to feel this way, but get back on that bronco and rein in an acceptance, cowgirl!”  Things I knew but needed reminding. I cannot say enough about the positive chi that comes from a writers’ community, whether local or virtual. Go get yourself one!

And, for more words on how to handle rejection, check out the last two posts & comments on Stories of life: one mom’s odyssey. Then come back and share your sorrows of rejection here!